bathtub cleaner, begone!

Handy Girl,

I think your idea is very admirable, the one about the skewerflags. It's a great idea and worth pursuing. I just don't think I want to get up that close to the piles if you know what I mean. It would make a fab art piece though...I do have a question about a totally unrelated topic. Cleaning the bathtub. What can I use if I don't have bathroom cleaner?

Hollyhock

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dear hollyhock,

when i was in the ninth grade, we were asked to do our final science project on a topic of our choice. i picked the tried and true erupting volcano and spent many hours building it out of papier mache, painting the mountain and attaching my real-to-life shrubbery and foliage in the form of broccoli trees, shredded cabbage greenery, buildings made from crackers and peanut butter, and cinnamon stick logs. there were even fisher-price figures standing at the foot of the mountain; their footpath sprinkled with eleven herbs and spices. the trick to making the volcano erupt was to have a container of baking soda inside the opening and add vinegar during the presentation. the two substances combine to foam up and bubble and overflow. my volcano was a success, and was put on the shelf of the classroom with the other science projects.

if you don't have bathroom cleaner, use baking soda and vinegar to clean your bathtub. it really does an amazing job at scouring right down to the nitty gritties. just wet down a soft cloth, like a rag from an old towel, put some baking soda on it, pour some vinegar on top and away you go. if you do have bathroom cleaner, get rid of it immediately! so many products are costly, unhealthy for the environment, and dangerous to your very own lungs and skin, and the lungs and skin of those around you and those who swim in our waters. save the planet one step at a time!

on the first day of the tenth grade, as students and teachers entered the school, it was clear that something, somewhere, was emitting a rather foul odor and the hunt began to locate the source. nobody could find it, but i knew the undeniable funk in the air was the combination of rotting cabbage, broccoli, eleven herbs and spices, crackers, peanut butter and cinnamon sticks, ingredients that had been sitting on the shelf all summer. i stayed after school that day, and when nobody was looking, quickly discarded the volcano into the garbage can, tied up the bag and took it away. baking soda and vinegar sure would have come in handy that day, to stamp out, disinfect and deodorize the lingering aftereffects of my quest for higher learning.